[Recommendations for the Muslim Home-Part 1]Making a good choice when choosing a wife.

What  are the  means  of  reforming  our homes?

The  following  contains  advice  on  this  topic.  May  Allaah benefit  us  from  it,  and  cause  the  Muslims  to  focus  their efforts  on  reviving  the  Muslim  home.

Forming the household

(1) Making a good choice when choosing a wife

“And marry those among you who are single [i.e., a man who has no wife and a woman who has no husband] and [also marry] the Saalihoon [pious, fit and capable ones] of your [male] slaves and maid-servants [female slaves]. If they be poor, Allaah will enrich them out of His Bounty. And Allaah is All-Sufficient for His creatures’ needs, All-Knowing [about the state of the people].”

[QUR’AAN 24:32].

The head of the household must select a righteous and suitable wife based on the following conditions described in various narrations of the Prophet of Allaah, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam:

“A woman may be married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty or her religion. Choose the one who is religious, may your hands be rubbed with dust [i.e., may you prosper]!”

(REPORTED BY AL-BUKHAARI AND MUSLIM).

“The world is all temporary conveniences, and the greatest joy in this life is a righteous wife.”

(REPORTED BY MUSLIM, 1468).

“Let every one of you have a thankful heart, a remembering tongue [remembering Allaah] and a believing wife who will help him with regard to the Hereafter.”

(REPORTED BY AHMAD, 5/282, AND AT-TIRMITHI AND IBN MAAJAH FROM THAWBAAN. SAHEEH AL-JAAMI’, 5231).

According to another report the Prophet of Allaah, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said:

“A righteous wife to help you with your worldly and religious affairs is the best treasure anyone could have.”

(REPORTED BY AL-BAYHAQI. SAHEEH AL-JAAMI’, 4285).

“Marry one who is loving and fertile, for I will be proud before the other Prophets of your great numbers on the Day of Resurrection.”

(REPORTED BY AHMAD. SAHEEH AL-IRWAA’, 6/195).

“I advise you to marry virgins, for their wombs are fresher, their mouths are sweeter and they are more content with little.” According to another report: “… and they are less likely to deceive.”

(REPORTED BY IBN MAAJAH. AL-SILSILAH ALSAHEEH, 623).

Just  as  a  righteous  wife  is  one  of  the  four  elements  of happiness,  so  a  bad  wife  is  one  of  the  four  elements  of misery,  as  the  Prophet  of  Allaah,  sallallaahu  ‘alayhi  wa  sallam says  in  the  authentic  Hadeeth

“One  of  [the  elements  of] happiness  is  a  righteous  wife,  who  when  you  see  her  you  feel pleased,  and  when  you  are  away,  you  feel  that  you  can  trust her  with  regard  to  herself  and  your  property.  And  one  of [the  elements  of]  misery  is  a  bad  wife  who  when  you  see her,  you  feel  upset,  she  keeps  attacking  you  verbally,  and when  you  are  away,  you  do  not  feel  that  you  can  trust  her with  regard  to  herself  and  your  property.”

On  the  other  hand,  it  is  also  essential  to  look  at  the  situation of  the  prospective  husband  who  is  proposing  marriage  to  the Muslim  woman,  and  to  agree  to  his  proposal  in  accordance with  the  following  conditions:

The  Prophet  ,  sallallaahu  ‘alayhi  wa  sallam,  said:   “If  there  comes  to  you  one  with  whose  religion  and character  you  are  pleased,  then  marry  your  daughter  [or sister,  etc.]  to  him,  otherwise  there  will  be  Fitnah  and  great corruption  in  the  land.”

All  of  the  above  must  be  achieved  through  asking  the  right questions,  verifying  facts,  gathering  information  and checking  sources,  so  that  the  home  will  not  be  corrupted  or destroyed.

The  righteous  man  and  righteous  woman  together  will  build a  righteous  home,  because  “the  vegetation  of  a  good  land comes  forth  [easily]  by  the  Permission  of  its  Lord,  and  that which  is  bad,  brings  forth  nothing  but  a  little  with difficulty…”  [QUR’AAN 7:58].

Taken from the book The Muslim Home-40 Recommendations by Sheikh Muhammad Saalih Al Munnajid.

To be continued next week in shaa Allah…

 

 


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